


you just may win

by peerieweirdo



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Job Hunters Au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-21
Updated: 2015-08-07
Packaged: 2018-04-05 11:43:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4178544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peerieweirdo/pseuds/peerieweirdo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Welcome to MAEWIN. The Mandatory Arena Education Worldwide Initiative.<br/>It's not who you know... but how you kill.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Carmilla sat on her bed, staring blankly at the page. She’d already finished this book twice, but she hadn’t had the chance to get any new ones recently. Although she found she never liked rereading old books. It just wasn’t the same if you knew what was coming. 

Turning the page, she sighed. Life had gotten really boring recently. It was easy to fall into a routine, and she knew that that could be dangerous. You became complacent. 

She shifted on her bed, hissing when a sharp pain shot up her back. That was what she got for sitting on her ass for all of last week. It wasn’t her fault that no one had come near enough to her to give her anything else to do. Still, she should have worked out more. A quiet week at work didn’t mean she could allow herself to lose her strength.

As it was, though, it was late on a Sunday night, and Carmilla was _really_ not in the mood to lift any weights. She could wait until tomorrow, when she got off the train. It wasn’t like she didn’t have enough of a workout nine-to-five anyway. 

A few muffled voices came down the hall, and Carmilla groaned. It must have been a move-in day again. 

Her last roommate had only lasted two and a half weeks, and since then she had been enjoying the bliss of an empty room. But, it appeared, that was about to be shattered. 

Move-ins were never fun. Carmilla had to deal with a new person to annoy the shit out of her, plus she knew they’d never last long anyway. It was completely worthless.

She could hear the door creak open as if it was being pushed by a snail on crutches.

“Uh, is this room 307?” a voice asked.  

“Yep,” Carmilla sighed, keeping her eyes fixed to her book. 

“So you must be Carmilla!” 

“Must I be?” 

_Good one._ She smiled to herself. These days, it was the small pleasures that really gave her satisfaction. And honing her witty remarks was a well loved pastime. 

“Uh… well… the lady downstairs told me that I was in room 307 and that Carmilla was my roommate, and since this _is_ room 307, I’m assuming you _are_ Carmilla.” 

Oh no. She was a talker. The last thing Carmilla wanted was to have to spend the next few days with someone who wanted to ‘get to know her’ or ‘become friends.’ Time to crank up the snark. 

“Wow, sweetheart, your detective skills would give Joan Watson a run for her money.”

Hearing a noise of frustration, Carmilla flicked her eyes up to see a tiny girl standing in the middle of the room, her fists clenched. She was cute, and Carmilla knew she wouldn’t even stay a week in this place. The cute ones never did. Not with that stature, and the fact that she couldn’t even formulate a decent comeback. 

“You’re rude _.”_

“Oh wow, I’m wounded,” Carmilla placed a hand on her chest in mock-offence. The girl screwed up her nose and went to sit on her bed, dumping her suitcase on the floor. 

“I’m new here, okay? So do you think you could just cut me some slack?” 

“Slack is how people get killed, darling,” Carmilla scoffed. 

“Oh, great, I’ve been here for literally ten minutes and we’re already talking about death, this bodes well,” she lay down on the bed, hands behind her head. Carmilla stared at her for a moment. Was she for real? If this tiny girl thought she had a chance of avoiding death long enough to land herself a safe, comfortable job to entertain her for the rest of her mediocre life…

“If you really think you can last this whole time without acknowledging the inevitability of death, be my guest.” 

Suddenly, the copper chute in between their beds began screeching, and a small canister fell out. The girl jumped in surprise, squealing slightly. 

She was scared of the damn _message chute._ There was no way Carmilla would have to put up with her for very long. 

Carmilla rolled over and picked up the canister, opening it to reveal a message.

 

**I’m making hot chocolate for the new recruits. Feel free to join us!**

 

She rolled her eyes. 

“What is it?”

“Perry just invited us for hot chocolate.” 

“Perry… was she that girl who greeted me when I got here?” 

“How the hell would I know?”

The new roommate stood up. 

“Are you coming?” 

“And spend time with you lackwits trying to make friends as if the entire exercise isn’t entirely futile? I think I’ll pass,” Carmilla bit. 

The girl just shrugged. “Suit yourself,” she said, before walking out of the room. 

Carmilla sighed. 

She really hated move-in-day. 

* * *

Laura slammed the door after her. 

So, her roommate was really rude. That was gonna make the next few months a lot harder to deal with. 

Still, she had to focus on the positives. The house was really nice, and from the tour she’d been given there seemed to be a lot to do. There was a games room and a lot of books in the library. And her room was nice, even if her roommate wasn’t. It was modern and minimalist, and Laura figured that once she’d hung a few posters and unpacked her stuff, it’d feel just like home. 

_Home._

Her thoughts turned to her dad, and she leaned against the closed door to her room. He was probably super worried about her, despite all the self defence lessons he’d given her over the years. And she knew he’d miss her, almost as much as she missed him. 

All the more reason to just keep her head down, not make enemies, and get out of this place as fast as possible.  

_Come on, Laura. Positive attitude._

She straightened up, put on a smile, and headed back down the corridor. She tried to remember the route they’d taken to get to her room, but the entire third floor seemed like a maze of identical white doors. She wandered for a while, before she rounded a corner and saw someone just leaving their room. 

“Hey!” she called, and the person turned round. Thankfully, they seemed a lot more approachable than Carmilla. 

“How do I get to the kitchen?” 

They smiled. “Have you been invited to Perry’s midnight feast as well?”

“It’s nine pm.” 

“I know, but Perr always likes having an early night,” they smiled. “I’m heading there too. Technically it’s only for the newbies, but I’m always allowed to gatecrash. Come on.” 

They began walking back the way Laura came, and Laura followed them, feeling like an idiot. As they walked, she tried to make conversation. 

“So, have you been here long?” 

“Not very. A few weeks, maybe? Not long enough for me to worry, you know?” 

“Yeah,” Laura chewed her lip as they began climbing down a stairwell that she hadn’t even seen. “How long are people usually here for?” 

“Job offers start coming in around about the six month mark, but a lot of people hold off. They’re waiting to get an offer they really want.” 

“What do you want?” 

They smiled. “Scientist or a doctor or something.” 

“Oh, that would be great!” Laura said. She wasn’t exactly sure how a doctor could really show their skills off to potential employers, but hey, there had to be doctors somewhere in the world, right? So why couldn’t one of them be… what’s-their-name. 

“Uh, what’s your name, by the way?” she asked.

They stilled slightly, before continuing climbing the stairs and acting like nothing had happened. “I go by my last name, LaFontaine.” 

“Oh cool. Is that, like, a thing here? Because I really don’t think I could go around being called ‘Hollis’.”

They laughed. “No, don’t worry. It’s just me.”

“Okay, awesome! I’m Laura!” 

“Nice to meet you!” 

They reached the end of the stairs, and LaF strolled into the kitchen, where a group of people was already gathering. They headed over, and the girl who had showed Laura around, Perry, beamed at them. 

“Oh, Susan, you made it! And Laura!” 

“Yeah,” LaFontaine gave her a tight-lipped smile. “Uh, this is Laura.”

Laura smiled and gave a small wave. 

“We’ve already met! How are you settling in?” Perry handed a mug of hot chocolate to Laura, who took it and smiled gratefully. Her dad used to make cocoa whenever she felt sad, and that piece of home was comforting. She’d only been there for one day, but she already felt homesick. 

“Pretty good. Excited to get started tomorrow. Although,” she frowned, “my roommate is super rude.” 

“I’m sure they’re not that bad, what’s their name?” 

“Carmilla.” 

Laura could immediately see Perry and LaFontaine grimace and share a look. 

“What?” 

“Nothing!” LaF replied, slightly too quickly to be comforting. “I mean, she _does_ have a reputation of being bad luck…” 

“But that’s probably all superstition!” Perry assured her.

“Call it what you want, Perr, but you can’t ignore the fact that the girl’s had fifteen roommates this year because no one lasts more than a few weeks with her.”

“She’s not _bad luck!”_

“Okay, so she’s killing her roommates. Is that really preferable?” LaF asked, and Perry fell silent, chewing her lip. Laura hated to admit it, but Carmilla killing people she shared a room with was a definite possibility. She did seem evil enough. 

“I’m sure I can handle myself,” Laura said, assuring herself as much as LaF and Perry. Her dad had warned her about everything and anything, and she’d been pretty confident that she’d manage. Now, though, she wasn’t sure. Carmilla had thrown her, she felt shaken and unbalanced. 

Everyone in the kitchen fell silent, and Laura turned to see what had happened. Carmilla was standing in the doorway, looking murderous. She walked over to Perry, and took a mug from the tray on the counter. The tension was palpable, and Laura wasn’t sure what to do. Should she say hi? Even if they weren’t _friends,_ they _did_ share a room. Then again, no one was saying anything, and LaFontaine was staring at their feet. 

“I just came here for the tiny marshmallows,” Carmilla mumbled, before turning and leaving the kitchen. 

“Yeesh!” Laura burst out once she was gone. “What id her actual problem?” 

“No one knows,” LaF said. “She’s been here for ages, so she _must_ have gotten some job offers. Who knows why she turned them down.” 

“Maybe she likes it here?” Laura suggested. 

“Probably. She has the best kill count in the entire house. Smashes them with a sledgehammer. Brains everywhere.” 

“Susan!” Perry berated them. 

“What? I’m doing Laura a favour. She needs to know this stuff before she goes into the arena tomorrow. Don’t want her to die on her first day.” 

 


	2. Chapter 2

Carmilla boarded the rusty, rickety train, feeling totally disappointed. It was another quiet day in the arena, and if she didn’t kill someone soon, she was going to lose her mind. The peace made her feel uneasy, as if it was the calm before the storm. She felt as though she was standing on a ledge, toes hanging over the side as she peered into a dark abyss. One small push, and she’d tumble over the edge.

She returned her sledgehammer back to the weapons locker, putting it in its usual place. Technically it wasn’t _hers,_ but she’d been using it every day since she’d arrived, and if anyone else dared take it, they wouldn’t last the day. 

It was a heavy, inelegant thing, but Carmilla found that that was what she liked about it. For one thing, her mother would be livid. Her _precious daughter_ doing something as primitive as smashing people to pieces. Considering how much time she’d spent training Carmilla to use graceful weapons such as poison darts, it would cause Maman to have a heart attack. 

What’s more, it was satisfying to hear the crunch of ribs and see a spatter of blood. Carmilla often had to soak her clothes in cold water and hydrogen peroxide after a good day in the arena. For a while, however, she’d been returning completely clean. Where was everyone? 

Finding her seat on the train, she noticed that Laura was still alive. Not that she cared much, but it was surprising. She’d probably hidden the whole day, which was a decent strategy for all of two days until someone noticed your routine, followed you, and put a bullet in your brain. 

And then Carmilla could once again enjoy her empty room, instead of having to return to the safehouse to find her roommate sticking a freaking chore-wheel to the wall. 

“Hey, Morticia,” a smug voice said. Carmilla turned to see Danny Lawrence sprawled across the train seats, her long legs taking up more space on Earth than was really acceptable. “Guess who’s gonna get the highest stats tonight?” 

“Unless the answer is a tap dancing pig, I’m not interested.”

“One day I’ll get you to admit that I’m better than you.” 

“Oh yeah,” Carmilla replied sarcastically. “Sitting up a tree shooting people with arrows from a distance. So badass.” 

“Well you can’t ignore the fact that I’ve had the best kill count for four days in a row. You’re losing your touch, Karnstein.” 

“It’s not my fault I haven’t seen anyone in days. Where are they all?” 

“Like I’d tell you,” Danny scoffed. “Anyway, I gotta go gloat in Kirsch’s face.”

And with that, she stood up and headed off down the train. Carmilla sat there, fuming. Danny always managed to get her blood boiling. She was so full of herself. Stats hadn’t even come out yet and she was boasting about getting the highest kill count. If she didn’t spend all day up a fucking tree, she’d already be dead. Unfortunately, it was hard to lug a giant sledgehammer up there to bash her brains out. But if she kept being so annoying, Carmilla may just find a way. 

The train ground to a halt and Carmilla jumped off, heading to the safe house. It was time for a debrief, which was never enjoyable. Especially since there were new residents, meaning there’d be the inevitable welcome video. 

Because that didn’t get old after the first thirty times. 

* * *

Laura was proud of herself. Her first day had gone surprisingly well. Not that that had stopped Carmilla from giving her the evil eyes on the train, but their time here would be torture if they didn’t at least try to get along (even if the chore wheel had gone down less than pleasantly.) 

It was with this in mind that Laura decided to sit next to Carmilla for the debrief. Carmilla just flicked her eyes to look at Laura once, before sighing and gazing at her boots, which were propped up on the seat in front of her. 

They sat in awkward silence, until LaFontaine and Perry sat down on the other side of Laura, bringing some much-needed chatter. 

“So then I said, ‘ _seriously, Nick? You can’t even remember to keep the cage locked_ -‘ Oh, hi L!” LaF waved. “You ready for orientation?” 

“Why is it now Wouldn’t it make sense to give us all this info _before_ our first day?” 

“I guess they want to weed out the easy kills,” LaF shrugged.

Laura was about to answer, but the room darkened and suddenly the screen at the front lit up. 

A chirpy, unaccented voice explained the concept of the Job Hunt (as if it wasn’t taught in schools every single year. If you’re going to force people to fight to the death for jobs, it makes sense to begin justifying it as early as possible.)

Laura was reminded of her third grade history teacher. She’d been an old, strict woman, and she’d stood up in front of the class and barked, ‘overpopulation!’

Then, when you got into middle school, you realised it was a lot more complicated. They’d had to do worksheets on job distribution and Laura remembered giving a presentation explaining why there wasn’t enough food to support everyone. 

And high school was a whole other fucking story. Laura had taken both History of Economics and Social Anthropology, and that was the perfect recipe for learning about the Job Hunt in detail. About how previous generations had ruined the economy, creating a job deficit at the same time as having lots and lots of kids. Meaning high unemployment and suicide. 

She wasn’t totally sure about the political side of it, but basically every kid in the country knew that the Hunt had been suggested multiple times before it was finally passed. 

Many people were reluctant at first, until the statistics came in from the first five years. No one was homeless. Everybody was physically fit. Thousands were saved in unemployment welfare and healthcare. 

And then, slowly, people stopped protesting. 

Realising she’d zoned out, Laura shook her head. The video was now saying how a fifth of them had prestigious careers ahead of them in many different fields. 

Hopefully she hadn’t missed something important. 

She looked to her left, to find Carmilla nonchalantly picking at her nails. Laura leaned over to Perry and whispered, “Hey, shouldn’t she be paying attention?” 

Carmilla must have heard, because she sighed in exasperation. “I’ve seen this video a thousand times, cutie.” 

_How the hell did she make ‘cutie’ sound like an insult?!_

 


	3. Chapter 3

Carmilla Karnstein and Laura Hollis were not a good match. Carmilla wasn’t sure what MAEWIN had been thinking when they’d paired her with a naive, reckless control freak who thought she understood the world after being in the arena for a week. 

It was laughable. She was practically a child, straight out of high school, yet she acted like she knew everything. She understood _nothing._

Carmilla, on the other hand, had been in the safe house for years. Her room had an order to it. Everything had a place (even if that place was often the floor). And now Laura just _waltzed_ in and expected her to _tidy?!_ Sorry, cupcake. Not gonna happen. 

It wasn’t like Carmilla wouldn’t be getting a new roommate in a month anyway. 

At least the sugar puff hadn’t stepped on Carmilla’s toes in the arena. Carmilla hadn’t even seen her in there. Not that that was the biggest of her problems. She hadn’t killed anyone in _weeks._ Where were they all? 

If kills didn’t start going up soon, they’d lift security measures on the house, and it would become a feee-for-all. It had only happened once before, and Carimlla could still remember it. The house was in carnage, blood everywhere. She was pretty sure someone got set on fire. 

Carmilla preferred to keep her murder from between the hours of nine and five, thank you very much. 

Plus, she knew Maman would be pissed if that happened. It would mean that Carmilla had failed at her job, and her mother was less than forgiving. 

She learned that the hard way. 

* * *

The message chute clanged, waking Carmilla with a jolt. She sat up, looking around. Laura’s bed was empty, and she could hear the shower gently through the wall. 

Rolling over, she took the canister out of the chute and opened it up. There were two messages. One for her and one for Laura. She tossed Laura’s on the empty bed and unrolled her own. 

 

**WEEKEND STATISTICS: CARMILLA KARNSTEIN**

 

**OVERALL RANKING: 3**

 

She stopped reading there. It wasn’t looking good. She was _third._

She’d been expecting to lose to Lawrence, but there was another idiot out there who’d somehow beat her? 

Was she really losing her touch? 

Before she could ponder on that terrifying possibility, Danny barged into the room. 

“Did you get it?” she demanded. 

“Hey, have you ever heard of _knocking?_ ” Carmilla replied. 

Danny said nothing, waking to the bed where Carmilla was lounging and towering over her. 

“What rank did you get?” 

“I’m still horrifically failing, if that’s what you mean.” 

“You didn’t get first?”

Carmilla blinked. “You mean _you_ didn’t get first? Then who the hell _did?”_

“I dunno,” Danny looked worried. “I asked Kirsch but he got fifth.”

This was not good. Lawrence had an extremely high kill count, and is some unidentified resident was beating her, then they were dangerous. 

Maman wouldn’t be happy. 

“Do you think they’ll go for us?” 

“It’s a logical strategy,” Carmilla said. “We’re the two biggest players. But with any luck they’ll get an offer soon and be out of our hair.” 

“Still, it’s kind of disconcerting, right? Someone we don’t know manages to beat both of us in one week? That’s a huge jump, we need to-“

“Carmilla, can you _please_ clear your hair from the drain? It’s disgusting,” Laura walked through from the bathroom and Danny fell silent. “Oh, sorry. I didn’t know Carmilla had a friend round.” 

“We’re not friends,” Carmilla deadpanned. With a quick glance she notices the short towel Laura was wearing, and the nauseating shade of Danny’s blush. 

Gross.

“Don’t you have someone else to annoy?” Carmilla said, if only to stop Danny from looking at Laura with that dopey smile. 

“Uh, yeah,” Danny’s eyes flicked to the floor quickly. “I better get going. See you, Karnstein. And…” 

“Laura!” 

“Laura,” she smiled. Carmilla made a vomit noise loudly, hoping that she’d _get the fucking hint._ “Uh, okay, bye.”

And finally, _finally,_ the she-giant left. Laura stood for a moment, staring at the door, before heading to the wardrobe and taking out some clothes. 

“Sooo…” she began, obviously trying her hardest to sound nonchalant. “Who was that?” 

“No,” Carmilla flopped down on the bed. “It’s too early to have to deal with your silly little crush.” 

“It’s two pm,” Laura frowned. “And I don’t have a crush.” 

“Sure. Wake me up in three hours,” Carmilla threw the covers back over her head and curled up, going back to sleep. 

* * *

Laura got changed and left the dorm room as fast as possible. She didn’t want to spend the second half of what had been a good Saturday so far hanging around with a sarcastic lump of blankets. 

When she reached the rec room, she found Perry and LaFontaine hunched over a chess table. 

Laura pulled up a third seat and sat between the pair. She didn’t know much about the rules of chess, but it looked like the black pieces were winning. 

“Hey, Laura, how was your shower?” Perry asked, moving a black pawn forward. 

“As good as a shower can be when your roommate keeps the bathroom covered in _gunk,”_ Laura said. 

“You know, maybe you just need to talk to her. A lot of problems can be solved with good communication!” 

“I _try_ to talk to her,” Laura sighed. “But then she just grunts or calls me something patronising like ‘sundance’ and I don’t get anywhere. Ugh!” 

“Hey, at least you’re not dead,” LaF moved their knight to take one of Perry’s pieces. “That must mean she likes you. Check.”

“Doubt it.”

They played in silence for a while, with Laura looking on. It was nice to relax at the weekend, and the gym in the safe house was good. Working out in the mornings always put Laura in a good mood. 

Until, of course, she walked out of the shower to find Carmilla and some girl facing off. 

“Hey, you know most people in this house, right?” Laura asked, straightening up. 

“Sure, why?” LaF said. 

“Do you know a girl who’s really tall-“

“Danny.”

“I didn’t even finish.”

“Doesn’t matter. You’re asking about a tall girl, it’s gonna be Danny Lawrence.” 

“Oh.” 

“Why are you asking about her? Check,” Perry moved a bishop and LaF made a noise of frustration. Perry stuck her tongue out and they laughed. 

“Carmilla was talking to her today.”

LaF and Perry once again shared a meaningful look. Laura wished they wouldn’t do that. It just reminded her that she was new and that they knew more than she did. 

“Yikes, that can’t mean anything good. They hate each other.” 

Laura frowned. What _were_ they talking about? If Carmilla was up to something fishy, she wanted to know. She wasn’t about to let herself be caught off-guard. 

Plus, her dream job was journalist. A little harmless investigation could be fun. 

“So… if I were to talk to Danny, where would I find her?” 

“Probably the archery range. Why?” LaF’s expression changed to one of realisation. “Wait. Do you have a crush?” 

“What?” Laura felt herself blush bright red. “No! I just wanted to see what she was talking to Carmilla about, that’s all.”

“Suuuuure,” LaF said, in a voice that indicated that they didn’t believe her at all. “Check mate!” 

“Dammit!” Perry said, as LaF got up off their chair and danced in celebration. 

They were both so focused on themselves that they didn’t realise when Laura stuck out of the room and headed out to the archery range. 

* * *

It was a really nice day out, and the lush garden looked beautiful in the sunlight. Laura could see a few people sunbathing, there was a soccer match going on, and a girl was taking photos over by the large oak tree. 

Laura walked past her and arrived at the archery range. She spotted the flash of Danny’s hair quickly and walked over. 

“Hey.” 

“Wait,” Danny told her, before taking her stance and notching an arrow. She aimed, her arm muscles taught. Laura stood watching as Danny’s face became totally focussed, her gaze fixed on the target in front of her. 

Her fingers released the string, and the arrow flew with alarming speed, hitting the target right in the bullseye.

“Nice!” Laura said, then mentally kicked herself. That was a stupid thing to say. 

Danny smiled shyly. “Thanks.” She placed her bow on the ground gently. 

“So, do you use a bow and arrow in the arena?” _Another stupid thing. Of course she does. Focus, Hollis._

“Uh, yeah. I don’t really like getting too close, you know?” 

Laura nodded rapidly. “Yeah, totally.” 

“What do you use?”

“Oh, uh, I use this small knife thing. It’s kinda lame.” 

“No, that’s cool!” Danny said. “Sounds like it takes a lot of skill.” 

“Not really. Not as mush as archery, I’m sure.” 

“It’s really not that difficult. Come on, I’ll show you.” Danny picked up the bow and handed it to Laura, who looked at it apprehensively. Her dad had trained her in many self-defence techniques, but _archery_ had never come up. She didn’t want to make a fool of herself in front of Danny. 

“Here,” Danny took her by the shoulders and fixed her stance, then helped her notch an arrow. Laura tried her hardest to regulate her breathing as a very attractive girl had her hands on her arms, but it was futile. 

Okay, so maybe Carmilla had a point. Maybe she had a teeny weeny crush. Barely noticeable. 

“Focus on the target…” Danny held her arms steady. “Aaaand… go!” 

Laura let go and watched as the arrow sailed over the target and landed in some bushes. 

“Crap.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” Danny assured her. “At least you didn’t hit anyone in the foot. That happens on my first try.”

“But you make it look so easy!”

“I guess it’s just practice. I can teach you, if you want.” 

Laura grinned. She wasn’t fussed about archery, but spending more time with Danny? Yes please.

“Yeah, totally!” 

“Cool,” Danny smiled, holding her gaze for a moment.

“Anyway, I better go. I have a bathroom to clean,” Laura said. 

“Alright, see you later.” 

“Take care!” Laura waved before walking back across the grass. 

_Take care? Really?_

She was halfway to the safe house when she realised she hadn’t asked Danny why she was talking to Carmilla. 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> okay so this is kinda short but this summer it has been relatively difficult to write so... sorry?

Another message. 

Carmilla frowned. It wasn’t the weekend, so it couldn’t be stats. And it wasn’t like she had all that many friends to send her messages on a Wednesday night. 

But sure enough, there it was. Addressed to her. 

She took the canister out of the chute and unrolled it. 

_We need to talk- M._

Ah, shit.

* * *

Luckily, the little creampuff had been invited to some get together by some annoying friend or another, so Carmilla didn’t have to come up with some excuse as to why she was sneaking out of their dorm room at ten pm.

She even passed them on her way out. She glanced over to see Laura laughing, playing a video game with an unidentified ginger. She was friends with so many, it was hard to tell who it was.

Seriously, what was it with all of the redheads around here?

She made it to the door without anybody noticing. Maman was already there, leaning over the balcony, poised as always.

“Mother.” 

She turned around, looking at Carmilla with an eyebrow raised. “Is that the warm greeting I get? After everything I’ve done for you?”

“What do you want?”

Carmilla really wasn’t in the mood for pleasant chat. If Mother was making house visits, something serious was going on. 

“Your stats, dear.” 

Carmilla paled. Of course. Maman was here to berate her for not being good enough. Could she _ever_ be good enough?

“I promise I’ll try to do better, I’m sorry-“

“Oh, no, it’s much too late for that,” her mother began pacing in her usual, business-like way. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but someone is getting top stats. The Lawrence girl we’ve accounted for, but this is new. This is _dangerous._ Whoever is getting these numbers could very well topple our whole operation.” 

“What do you want me to do?”

“I think we’re past the point of you being able to do anything, dear. I’m sending your sister in.” 

“Mattie?” Carmilla felt relief course through her. Mattie was okay. She could trust her. 

“That doesn’t mean you can slack. I’ve allowed this little rebellion of yours but I need all hands on deck here. Imagine if this person finds out what you are. Imagine if they _kill_ one of us. We can’t allow it.” 

Carmilla was unable to say much other than “yes Mother.”

“Good girl. Mattie will be here in the morning.” 

* * *

Laura was completely _slaying_ at Mario Kart. 

So far she’d played Danny, LaF and some large dudebro who’d been introduced as ‘Kirsch’. And people were beginning to be reluctant to take her on. 

Hey, with a Dad who hardly let her out of the house, she picked up a few skills. 

Plus, the feeling of everyone laughing and joking in the communal area, patting her on the back, made her feel all warm and fuzzy. She had _friends._

Even if her roommate wasn’t one of them. 

“Rematch?” Danny challenged her. 

“Oh, you are _on!”_

Halfway through her final lap, Laura had an idea. 

“Haha! Take banana peel, sucker!” Danny yelled in triumph.

“Oh no, you got me!”

Okay, so maybe losing on purpose wasn’t the most honest strategy out there, but she didn’t want everyone to think she was a gloating asshole. Plus, she didn’t want to play another game anyway. 

When Danny crossed the finish line before her, she jumped up off the couch and raised her hands in the air. 

“BOOYA! I BEAT THE UNSTOPPABLE HOLLIS, BOW DOWN MORTALS!”

Everyone cheered, and Laura couldn’t stop the grin that spread across her face. 

“Hey, Lawrence, wanna see how you do against me?” Kirsch said with a cocky smile.

“You mean how I do against a silly little man-child who probably can’t play video games for shit? Totally.”

Laura handed Kirsch the controller and moved to sit beside Perry on the couch. Everyone looked on in anticipation. The clock counted down. 

And that was when the insults started flying. 

“Get out of my way you asswipe!”

“Not a chance, shitmuncher!” 

“You’re such a dickbag!” 

“Better than a fuckweasel!”

Laura had never heard so many curse words used so creatively. 

“Hey, is this how Danny and Kirsch always act?” she asked Perry quietly. 

“Yeah, you don’t want to hear them when they’re arguing about something important.”

The noise was getting slightly too much, so Laura stood up and walked through to the kitchen. Luckily, no one was there. She poured herself a glass of water and took a long drink. 

After a while, she heard footsteps behind her, and she turned to see Danny. 

“Ugh, I can’t _believe_ Kirsch. He’s such an asshole, he freaking _green shelled me.”_

“Yeah, doesn’t sound like Marquess of Queensberry rules,” Laura joked. 

“I just wanna kill him! And then he brought up his kill count, as if it was anything impressive. I’ve beat him every single day and he knows it. He’s an obnoxious dick!” 

“You should totally-“

“I can’t believe I’m dating him!”

Laura blinked. “Dating?” 

“Yeah.” 

“You’re dating Kirsch?” 

Danny looked at her in confusion. “Yeah?” 

“I’m sorry, it’s just, you two don’t exactly… act like a couple. In fact you don’t even act like you like each other.” 

“Kirsch is insufferable sometimes, but he’s also kind of sweet. You just gotta get past his layers of asshole.”

Laura knew she didn’t have a right to feel disappointed, but she couldn’t help it. She had thought that her and Danny had… well, something. 

Not only that, but Danny is dating someone she doesn’t even seem to _like?_

She would never understand the people in this house. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> this is set in the universe of the job hunters webseries, which you can watch on youtube  
> written by carmilluminati on tumblr


End file.
